All at once

Well it was bound to happen, as it does with all parents. That one day, that one time that everything happens all at once. Let me explain just what I mean.

Gabe offered to help feed Abigail by bottle so I could get lunch made. I put a pot of water on the stove and started getting everything ready for a pasta salad.

After a few minutes I went into the living to see how things were going with the feeding. Abigail was faced away from Gabe and he hadn't noticed that she had slipped down and was scrunched up (TV has a way of distracting him).

I start to say "that position isn't good for feeding because....",

Well, Abigail felt it was better to show him why, by projectile vomiting out her mouth and through her nose.

Of course she started to choke on all the milk that had just come out of every hole in her face so I grabbed her and rushed to the kitchen sink with her face down, as she chokes up all the milk that is left in her airway and I basically washed her down clothes and all. By the time I got her washed off and peeled down, Gabe had come into the kitchen with a towel for me to dry her off.

The water at this point is boiling on the stove, splashing over onto the burner, she is screaming her face off because she is now very mad at what just happened, and she is cold, wet and naked. Then it happens, she pees on me. It goes all the way down my pants and all over the floor.

Of course, this left us with vomit in the living room, and pee in the kitchen. Gabe was SOAKED, I was SOAKED. It was a little like a Chines fire drill with us both running around trying to "fix" things, and if it was caught on tape, The Entertainer would be the appropriate choice for the soundtrack.

It was quite the ordeal. Needless to say, lunch was finished, the house didn't burn down and we all made it through. Phew.